Though I may be the quiet one. But, I have a soul, and a voice to be heard. A heart to be mend, and a life to live. Where to start? With JC of course. Where does it end? With a room full of love that will last a lifetime.
I think God gave me the gift to seek out those who are in need. If that makes any sense. I guess even when I was little, without me even knowing it, my friends. I seeked out those who were in need. Some gave me different challenges and everyone was different. But all of them now that I look at it, needed something. And I was always there to provide it. I can remember all those when I was a little girl. Even friends from my childhood that I still talk too, call me up and not only seek for a great time on the phone but guidance, sometimes even closure. Each of my friends now, I see something that I could and can help with. For the longest time, I always seeked in changing peoples lives. And I was doing it without even noticing but being myself.
God’s gift is all that I want to endure and all that I ever want.
He gave me all the power he can so I can do what I was meant too. And nothing is going to stop me. Now that I have really noticed it. And realized it.
I think Mormon-ism. Is a bullshit religion. Made by a dude who got bored one night. Who wanted more then one wife because he got bored with the one and only. And wanted to watch porn. And wanted everyone else too do it too. I’m sorry for those who got railed into this situation because of their generation. Ya’ll need too step out of your comfort zone and realize this shit ain’t nothing but a bullshit retitled should not be called a bible crap.
I truly feel sorry for ya’ll.
For those who can argue with me.Throw it at me. I want to hear it all.
Soo. Wii or Xbox360?; is thinking about moving to Washington or Oregon; YAY it’s thanksgiving tomorrow! Two thanksgiving and non at my house, this is the first! It makes me sad to think about this is probably going to be the last time we can get together and technically we can’t on this amazing holiday.
Family; well my sister and her amazing family.
My run to guide; my baking buddy; my sister and brothers in Christ; my close friend.
It was hard to deal with my rock/best friend leaving. I don’t know how I can handle my inspirations and closet family moving to another state. To go with them? Follow them in a couple of years? … I can’t leave my parents. At least not right now. They need me here.
Family means everything to me. It sucks having this being torn again. In the future, whether or not they leave for sure. I know, I’ll be right behind them.
I really don’t know what I’d do without my boys. My Michael or my little Evan.
I guess these six months should be critical. Not wasting time alone, but in the company of the ones you love. Cause you never know.
On national television, if you were asked to describe the 21st century what would you say?
Technology happy, Money hungry, Selfish, Disgusting, No self respect, Self Absorbed people. At least, because of technology and money it gave medical opportunities for patients. Talking to people outside of the united states has gotten easier. Though, technology has taken over the world. If I could I would refuse to be “upgraded” because of how much of our generation is obsessed with it.
“The time that wall street has big money and it’s completely government controlling. There isn’t anymore middle man. Your either rich or poor. Nothing more. I had more money in my pocket 5 – 6 years ago, when I was working less, and had a smaller salary. Most people are afraid that in ten years from now when our kids have kids, they won’t be able to afford college. We can hardly pay for my daughters college rates as it is. Yeah were going to have great technology, but what does that pay for as a working man. Do we all have to be a techie to earn a good living? It is the biggest recession in history. But come on now people. Without us little people, where would you be? And if you say still where you are. Stop lying to yourself. Without us. No Votes. No competition. No Reasoning. No Nothing. If we die out, the world wouldn’t work as it is.” - My Father and I.
What sucks about the Nv elections this year around, the gay rights took a shit toll in this. Is there ever going to be an end to the hate in this state? When are we going to get with the program and allow non straight individuals to get married to one another? People have the right, just like everyone else in this country to love whom ever they want and say I do too. You accuse them for being wrong. Well who told you to be straight? When are you going to come out and tell the world you like the opposite sex. When did you decide to be straight? It just maybe a crime. They don’t mind if your straight, just don’t flaunt it in public, since you don’t like to see them. Since, people like “them” shouldn’t be allowed anywhere.
It frustrates me how bad this hatred over comes love. How many people take they’re own lives because of all the fucking crap, we starotype them into. How much torture fucked up individuals do to a innocent being. HOW CAN YOU LIVE WITH YOUR DAMN SELF KNOWING YOU HAD A PART OF THIS FUCKED UP SHIT? Knowing you may have drove this person to become suicidal? Or worse, how can you live with yourself being a murder. God hates them too ya know? Scratch that. GOD DOES NOT HATE ANYONE! It’s straight up in the bible. Read that. He forgives! And loves you for who you are! It’s okay to not be okay. All you ass hole hyprocritical christians who give all of us, a bad name. We need to fucking to come together and accept one another for who they are. Have damn peace in this world. Share the love. Because of that, they are scared to ever walk into halls of a church.
And that’s what Central is about. We are not like that others. Ya’ll just jealous. ;)
People just need to grow some fucking balls man. And deal with the situation at hand. And accept that life isn’t the way everyone before us planned it out to be.
AHHHHHHHH. People of our generation makes me angry. But because this is how the world is, there is nothing we can do about it. But take a stand. And try to help and be the change of the world.
And that’s exactly what I’m going to do.
Sorry, that’s my rage of religion, polictics, and our generation.
Today in class the question for journal is. What do you think about the many different definitions of Sexual Orientation. In that part in general. Which are you?
I think labels are wayy over rated. And we shouldn’t object ourselves to this day and age. We don’t need to define ourselves to the world. So they can be satisfied to have something over you. Who cares, is my question? So what, my best friend is gay? My little cousin is confused about his/hers sexuality. Or all my friends have an obsession with sex. This whole world is. It’s nice and dandy that we have names for it. But we don’t need to use it. Some even have a physiological explanation for “everything.” We chose to be lesbian? You think they chose to be attracted to girls? No, I don’t know how many times they tried not doing so. Because of everything. Being justified. Being exiled. Being down rated because of family. Or friends. Being thrown out of a church community who “LOVES” you, until she slips. Did you not hear about the problem now, between the ages of 13 – 25 kill themselves because of the verbal and physical abuse they receive cause of their “orientation.” WTH is wrong this generation? Can you guys live with yourselves knowing you had something to do with someone taking they’re own life? May God have mercy on your soul, when it comes to judgment time.
But I’ve accepted our generation, accepted who my family is, who my friends are, the century that we live in. And now, I have no expectations. I have no expectations to how the world should be anymore. I am going to stop bitching about it. And now, I am going to be the change I want to see in the world. I am going to be the one person who believes in what she wants too, who might even tweak the rules. I am going to be that one of many (hopefully) who will do everything in her power to stop this hatred. It starts with one soul, to bring a difference to this world.
Really? At 18? Can we just stop with the “Oh Grace, Btw, you just got diagnosed with _____.” You fill in the blank. Granted, I might have something similar or related to it. Sometimes I just want to crawl in a corner and become a hermit for the rest of my life. But what would they say at my funeral if I did? All my hopes and dreams will never be a reality. I know and will take this as a new opportunity. Though it is crushing one dream, it’s just another blessing in disguise. And I’m going to keep on telling myself that, till this world has nothing more to offer me. To keep strong, to keep me informed, to build courage, pride and ability. To regain confidence and self-esteem. Keep my life in a positive aspect. Be above and beyond this generation that I am disgusted with.
If only they really knew what they are up against. What they are taking advantage of. What are they’re doing to themselves not only emotionally but physically. How much of loyalty, honesty, respect, empowerment, love, and so much more, has gone out the window. Just because of peers or the opposite sex. It’s sad. But hey what can I do, besides be above the heart break, war, influence and devastation.
We all go through hard times. We all go through our ups and downs. Feeling empty. Feeling abandoned, heart broken, feared, depression. Most indefinite, lost.
Either we have family and friends to help you through, sometimes they don’t even know. Or your all by yourself, and only you and your crazy, not-so-sane-anymore thoughts. Most people look for an outing, like a significant other, baby, drugs, alcohol, sex. Not a lot of people look for God, or within themselves to gain that empowerment again. And that my friend, is what I’m going to do. I’ve been through a lot. And that’s just the beginning of a journey. And after I hear these results, I’m starting a new banging out-of-your-mind chapter.
God will bless us with opportunity’s. It’s up to us, if we take it or leave it. And how we handle it.
New Entry: 8:30 pm Wednesday Oct. 27, 2010.
So you think you got what it takes to tear this young girl apart? You think you can get me to give up? Psh. You have another thing coming. I’m a whole other race then the rest of the world. And I’m not going without a fight.
Wow, then you have to have a problem with the first church in Acts. It’s 20,000 people. First time they talked about it, it was 2,000, 3,000. Then in Acts 4 it’s 5,000 man strong. Well then if you include women and children, there’s quite a lot.
From the beginning.
Everyman is put into a small group of ten.
Each one, teach one.
Change your community with friends. That will have a positive influence in your life.
50 years what makes people happy.
Happiness is best predicted by the breath and depth of your social connections. In other words if you got good friends. Positive friends, your going to be way happier then someone who doesn’t. If you join a group, you up your risk of not dying in the next year in half. Having these connections help your health in every way possible. Robbert Putnum, Harvard Researcher, how to make people happy.
Who you hang out with in the long term, is going to affect you in the long term. Your not Jesus.
Own your own mission.
You don’t get anywhere, by yelling at people, and condeming them. Ya they might need to hear it but do it in a sense where you two talk. Write a letter. Treat them with respect. Love, and compassionate, and listen to them.
17.5 people a day last year got baptized.
Kaelyn Jade. Louis Bahm, Fay Ebal, Emily and Ryan. Jon and Jarvis Brown. Tyler and Riley. Laryssa Stepp.
Adderation. Confession. Thanksgiving. I thank you, Supplication. ACTS.
Own it. Taking full responsibility. Live Out Loud.
Had a pretty good day. I hope my dad did too; I’m very proud of you. I hope you know that. You made my heart smile and shed some waters today seeing you. Though, we have our issues, and our arguments about whatever it may be. I know we as a family don’t show it as much as we should, I love you dearly.
I don’t have expectation for anyone or anything. I just have expectation for god. I removed all this plans and thoughts. And I’m taking the Rehab Relationship Challenge. Expect difficulty in an imperfect world.You think the grass is greener on the other side? Then I guess it’s time for you to water your own lawn. :) Don’t give up. Expect disappointment in a imperfect relationship. Living is Grace. Experience is love. Raise your expectations for God. Readjust your expectations for others. Expect the perfect love that only God can provide. Rehab your priorities. And Put God in the center of your relationships.
There are some things in the bible I do not agree with.
I don’t know if that would make me not a christian?
That indeed I would like to know.
Errr, there are so many opinions I have. Before I was scared to even think about talking about them.
Now, it’s just like who gives a two cents. This is my blog. My thoughts. My feelings who are you to judge me.
Unless you died on a cross, shed your blood to save my sins. Then and only then, you will be allowed to judge me.
People are so hypocritical in this religion. It’s quite funny. I’m not saying that I’m a perfect person. I’m just saying if you preach it you should practice it. I don’t know how many times I came across someone that I just turned my head and bite my tounge. People shouldn’t also hide behind religion. That bugs me.
And then when being confronted, use a not even close to what you were talking about quote from the bible. You say it. But you never endure it.
I decided to change you. And to leave all this behind. And just carry on the amazing memories I had. I’m letting everything go. And letting God guide me. Change isn’t always for the best. But we come to this place in your life, where everything that mattered before, doesn’t. Just three simple categories in your agenda. From now on forward. No plans. Just Dream, Hope, Faith, and Patience. But thanking you for all the little things that most of us take advantage of. And just enjoy life, while letting my faith take the wheel.
This summer has taught me a lot. Scratch that this past school year taught me more then I can even comprehend. I’m grateful for everything. For you. My parents, church. My Best friends. My family. The people who brought into my life and taken out. The consequences of situations. Life. Everything. Thank you. Life could be better in a lot of ways. But where I am to complain. It keeps me going. As much as I would love for you to bring some people back into my life. I’ve realized you took them out for a reason, to not only teach me but to teach others as well.
FUCKKKKK YOU Hyperbolic Definitions! Who ever thought of Trig 101 SHOULD BE SHOT! But then applaud for his brilliance; KAELYN JADE! I F’N miss you. Life without you here just isn’t the same. I wish you would call Nanay and I. :/ And tell me how your first day in a public middle school in THE GHETTO 209 was. I miss my not so baby anymore niece. You COMPLETED MEEE! D:
LADY GAGA IS NOT A MALE! Retards. Really?! Hints to why she hardly ever wears clothing anymore, and they have clearly not touched or edited photos of her from a newborn to teen to now.
Now ya’ll get a life. Stop being stupid and leave the poor lady alone! Damn. Ya’ll just can’t appreciate talent when you see it. Sometimes weird. But that’s just who she is. Accept it. Or SHUT THE HECK UP!
PS stop comparing her to Michael Jackson.
There’s absolutely no comparison besides they’re both legends. And they’re not afraid to do something different. Being above and beyond the accepted now-a-days artists.
OMG, were all here together gathering one last time. To celebrate the accomplishments of life, and high school. An end to a whole new beginning. Though I did not have a senior year with everyone as I hoped, it was quite amazing to see my fellow seniors graduate yesterday. No doubt, I was ballin like a baby before I even walked in the door. I miss everyone there, and I was so siked to see each and every one of you. And once again, I just wanted to say congratulations one last time. And wish you all the best of luck. And keep in touch! Please keep in touch. I wanna know every bit!
Now it’s time to party like a rockstar! And enjoy freedom until the next two to four years of education or more.
Your all starting fresh. Keep it clean! And have fun! Take Chances, and change the world like I know you guys can.
And to the soon to be seniors do it BIG! Ya’ll got this in a bag. :)
I know that in the future there are going to be more times where I just want to break down and cry. Probably more so then I have in the past. This is only just the beginning of what life really has to unfold for us. But I’m scared shit less.
I’m scared of everything. Trial and Error, Fired and Hired, Lack of everything. But more of all. People. I don’t like getting close, nor will I ever get close like this to others. I may be friends still with those I have came across, but in the future, we never know. But why am I running scared, when I told you I have faith in everything you have in store for me.
My whole life is running different. And that is indeed scary.
They are graduating tomorrow.
But why do I feel pity?
I know I’m going to burst out in tears either way this goes.
There is a time that comes in your life, where, you just don’t care anymore. Where, life has taken every bit out of you, and nothing really matters besides the basics anymore.
Where you don’t care about what other people think. Do. Say. Even if it’s your best friend on the other end of that line. - If it’s meant to be it will happen. Right? They have to learn on they’re own.
You learn that trying to make everyone get along, be happy, and not fuck they’re life over. Isn’t worth it. Isn’t worth being run down. Isn’t worth putting everything you have in to it, when they’re going to put half ass into it. And not really give a two shits about what your trying to do for them.
Life is way to precious to worry about all this bullshit. Let it ride, and have fun.
Life has a weird way of working things out I guess.
I am not going to make plans anymore. Every time I do, things get messed up. So I leave my future in the only hands I can trust enough.
First on the list: I know I’m lame. BUT, you can never out grow being a kid.
- Build-a-bear: I never made one before.
- Watch The Last Air bender midnight series; June 30: Eclipse. I should brush up on that one.
- Go shooting :)
- Diversity: Tattoo; Piercing? You know what’s retarded? My mom will let me get a tattoo but not a piercing. Does she know it’s permanent yes. We have discussion this, she just isn’t that into piercings and tattoos. Though I might be filled with those one of these days just to see what she would say.
DMV! Stupid shit. -.-‘;
Sign up for everything I couldn’t before. o.0
Buy cigarettes for someone.. LOL.
I AM SAD. I MISSED THE LGBTQ PROM. -.-‘; Not that I would actually have that “one” to take, I just like MasQUEERades :D that and I love the community.
So I have a question, what do you think would be the best laptop to use for everything? Also, Cellphone, will soon be my life. Stupidly because in what I’m going to get into. Hopefully not though. Fingers crossed. Anyway I would love everyone opinion about it.
Wifi and everything. :) Hope ya’ll have a good day, take care.